CHOOSING A SPORT

My son loves Basketball! He is blessed to be 6'10" and playing at a high major D1 university. But when he was young, his father and I both agreed that we wanted our son to ‘choose’ basketball on his own and never feel forced to play. So, in an effort not to push our son into playing basketball, I spent many years driving him to a variety of sporting events, activities, summer camps and tryouts, encouraging him to try any sport he wanted to try. By 5^th grade he had participated in soccer, karate, baseball, ice skating, street hockey, roller hockey, bicycling (even completed a century with me. That’s 100 miles!) track, football, swimming, ballet (I convinced him that Michael Jordan actually took ballet), and of course… basketball. He usually made it clear that he liked basketball the most. I coached his first three basketball teams. Then, in 7^th grade, His dad had a talk with him about the seriousness of the game and how highly competitive it was. He told our son that we would completely support his efforts and that if he really loved it and practiced hard, he could get a scholarship to college and possibly play in the NBA and overseas someday. 

By 7th grade, he was a one-sport athlete - Basketball.

It was important to me that my son, who I knew would be very tall, didn’t feel pressured to play basketball. Yet, I also wanted him to know that whatever he decided to try, he should give it his best effort and I would be there to cheer him on. It was also important to his father and I, that he try many extra-curricular activities so that he never had regrets that might come with putting all his efforts into one thing too early. 

With year-round sports, it’s very difficult to help your child have fun participating in many sports at a young age, while waiting to choose that one sport that they may actually want to commit to training for12 months of the year. It is my opinion that children need the opportunity to try many sports before they can know what they like and where they will succeed. I even had my son take ballet, piano, guitar, and acting. He really wanted to learn saxophone as well, but I after I bought a used sax for $250, I could not afford to get it tuned or pay for the lessons needed. Acting, dance, piano, and guitar were offered during the after-school program for a nominal fee. Acting was affordable through the local community center and dance, piano, guitar, and chess were taken in after school programs. Sports and other extra-curricular activities can be expensive at times, but I quickly learned that if I volunteered to help out and if I let those in charge know that I could not afford the full cost, there was usually a scholarship available or a discounted price given.  

As your children grow up, keep them active and sign them up for many different activities. One at a time is more affordable and allows them to focus in. And most importantly, encourage them, cheer them on and ultimately let them choose the sport they love, then cheer them on every step of the way!

Our family motto: Pursue Excellence, Cheer for Others, Do what's Right.

ENCOURAGING YOUR YOUNG ATHLETE

The best thing we can say to our kids regarding their participation in sports is, “I love watching you play…………!  It’s great to see you compete and have fun!”

Comment on specific things your child did well, but Refrain from giving a critique unless they ask you for specific feedback. Remember that their coach has probably already informed them of what they need to work on.

They just want to know we were there and we enjoyed watching.

FANatic Behavior and the Safety of Athletes.

In no other situation would it be acceptable for Jeff Orr, a grown man, or any other fan, super-fan, or booster to hurl insults at our sons. So why is it tolerable at a sporting event?!?

Since the Marcus Smart/Jeff Orr incident, there have even been a serge of comments such as, "he's going to hear a lot worse when he gets to the NBA", “It’s not fair. Life isn’t. Just walk away” and “those in that spotlight, are subjected to certain levels of disrespect and hatred”.

Is that really ok with us as a society? Do we really want to condone the outright disgusting display of hate and intolerance or bullying at a sporting event, when it would never be ok with us on a city street, in the workplace, or in a school?

What makes us excuse these behaviors in the name of ‘Super-fans’?

Jay Bilas posed the question, “Does a university booster get to say whatever he wants, and a “student athlete” is required to take it? What responsibility does TTU have?”

We, sports fans, parents of athletes, and the media, have a responsibility to stop this from happening and put a spotlight on Fan Behavior and Player Safety!

As a parent of a KU basketball player, I have heard horror stories of spitting, screaming, obnoxious, hateful fans at away games. I’ve been warned about certain rival schools. Am I really supposed to be afraid to be in attendance at a rival school? And if so, should I be worried about the safety of my son and his teammates when they are playing these opponents?

Just last night I attended the KU v K-State game. On three different occasions during the game, the K-State fans chanted F*** KU! over and over. It was shameful. And no one, not the coach, the AD, the announcers, no one said a thing to stop it. We, the KU family members in attendance were told to stay in our seats and wait for police to secure the team and our seating area after the game because they knew it would be difficult to control some crazy fans.

I mean seriously, how far are we going to let this type of negative fan behavior go in the name of ‘super-fans’ and universities that don’t reprimand and control it? And even more ridiculous and disgusting if a university’s boosters are acting this way and no one wants to do anything for fear of losing their financial support! Isn't it possible to have fun and enjoy sporting events without insulting the players or threatening the opposing team and family?   

My son and at least 4,200 other sons playing Division 1 basketball, along with numerous other athletes and families are often subject to this insanely crazy fan behavior, yet they are expected to do nothing and say nothing in response.  Just take it….       

What are we teaching our youth?